The “R” Word

Why I had to write this post…(or “Why Facebook sometimes makes me crazy.”)

What compelled me to write about this video and the issues surrounding it is the insanity of religious people (I mean here people who embody the negative traits associated with religion) accusing other people of being religious, apparently blind to the fact that these negative traits being plainly present in their own lives. Having being mired in the deepest crevices of the lowest road on this issue, they talk and act like they are on the highest road possible.

When this video was linked over Facebook it struck me that many of the people sharing it personally exhibit or are part of Christian churches that champion the very traits that Bethke is clearly targeting. Many of my peers have un-ironically linked this video with comments like, “How true!” or “I love this!” or “I hate religion!” and yet this video targets many of their attitudes and behaviors. They are apparently oblivious to the fact that their approach to faith and their treatment of other people are exactly what Bethke and others have in mind when they use “religion” as a slur.

I’m not trying to be a jerk, but I feel like I’m taking crazy pills here. It made me feel like this…

This is an actual picture of my face when I was scrolling through who linked this video on Facebook.

I mean, do you honestly not see that you are championing a message and values that you deny with your very lives? Why are you linking something that so radically criticizes what you are so clearly a part of? You are the people who confuse being Republican with being a Christian.  You are the ones who talk about grace but if a person disagrees with you on one political or doctrinal point you treat them like complete trash.  You are the ones who uphold non-biblical spoken and unspoken religious rules that people have to obey or face social or spiritual condemnation. You are the ones who attend churches where Jesus is absent and would not be welcomed.

This video is the tip of the much larger iceberg and I instantly thought of two other things that reminded me of the insanity of this situation.

First, years ago a Christian woman put up a Facebook status that said, “It’s not about a religion! It’s about a relationship!” While this phrase is cliché I have come to a place where I believe this is absolutely true.  Jesus Christ Himself said that eternal life “is knowing the One True God and Jesus Christ whom He sent.” The insanity making part of this situation is that this woman is part of a Christian denomination so hypocritical, legalistic and judgmental that people (even other Christians) ask me if it is a cult when I describe it. I cannot speak to her personal faith but the background she comes from certainly is not one conducive to a relationship with Jesus or even other people.

Second, I instantly thought of the gigantic walking inconsistency that is the life and ministry of Mark Driscoll. Like my friends on Facebook, Driscoll is apparently unaware of the inconsistencies that riddle his life and teaching.

For example, a few days ago I saw Mark Driscoll tweet this:

The problem I see is Driscoll preaches and teachings condemnation basically non-stop. A fair paraphrase of this verse given Driscoll’s life and ministry would be:

“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus…unless you are gay, or do not do church right, or believe the wrong things about Jesus, or do not do not run your family in a traditional fashion with the male as the leader and provider, or are not violent enough, or do not have the right type and amount of sex, or do not have the right amount of tattoos (not too much, but just enough), etc.” – Driscollites 8:1

Another example is that Driscoll preaches and teaches that all Christian men are called to be assertive, type A, aggressive, physically strong and violent men who take firm leadership and control over the women and children in their lives. If you are anything else or anything less you are not being a real biblical man and you are probably gay.  Yet, after teaching this, he then screams “How dare you!” at men who are physically abusive and neglectful towards their wives in his church.

So let me get this straight.  You teach that being a physically violent, aggressive and assertive male patriarch is the one true biblical way to be a man and are then surprised that domestic violence, abuse and neglect of women is going on in your congregation?

Now I realize Driscoll’s heart is really to teach and enforce a form of benevolent sexism, but in my opinion Driscoll has sown the seeds of domestic violence and abuse with his teaching and then rebukes men for bearing the fruit of listening to him. Apparently Driscoll fails to connect the dots.

I could (and probably should) really stop there, but I’m not going to because here is the real kicker…

In this sermon Driscoll claims religion never leads to joy or humility because religion makes a long list of rules. Those who manage to obey them become self-righteous prideful jerks and those that realize their own hypocrisy and inability to live up to them are led to despair and depression. I agree with this estimation and almost all of what Driscoll says in this sermon.  (The comments come around the 7:00 and 8:00 mark.)

Now let me highlight a few things:

The point I am making is this: Driscoll professes to hate the religion “other” Christians are involved in, whereas he gets the Gospel and loves Jesus.  However, the hallmarks of religion that Driscoll himself has identified appear readily apparent in his own life and his brand of Christianity. Driscoll and his ilk fall under his own critique and his own words condemn him.

Hypocrisy or Bondage

These are just some examples of where people who embody the negative traits associated with religion and yet accuse other people of having those traits, apparently blind to their own issues.

There are at least two basic options that explain these situations.

First, it is possible that these people are hypocrites.  I mean that in the true sense of the word hypocrisy.  People may genuinely aspire to values they fail to meet due to common human frailty. This is not hypocrisy.  We all make mistakes or compromises but this does not necessarily detract from the sincerity with which we hold to certain values. True hypocrisy is where someone says they value something that they do not. Some of these people could just be feigning a hatred of these negative traits because that is what is in fashion right now or for some other reason, even though they really do not.

Second, it is possible that these people are so deep in bondage that they cannot see the inconsistency between what they value with their lips and what they live out in their lives.  Religious people can be so steeped in what they have always known and been taught that they cannot see all of these evil traits in their own lives even as they protest against these traits and truly do despise these traits. I was there most of my life and am probably still there in many ways that I do not even realize. I, like the lady I mentioned, have said “It’s all about a relationship!” even as I was hyper-religious and had no relationship with God. It does not make it right, or less insane, but I honestly believe this is where most of the people in these situations are at.

What I have said so far really only sets up to the real point of my post, which lies on the next and final page…

About Speakfaithfully

I am figuring out life and faith and taking other people along with me on my journey. Sometimes as fellow travelers, sometimes as hostages.
This entry was posted in Faith, Personal Commentary and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to The “R” Word

  1. jrlookingbill says:

    ‘Captain Obvious’ can be very much forgiven so long as he admits to his own failings, which you have done eloquently. What’s more, others are challenged by this to do less work ‘hating religion’ and more looking in the mirror. I hope other people make us of this because I must not be the problem. 😉

  2. Phil Bjornberg says:

    Reinforces what I learned in a community of broken folks participating with God’s grace to practice daily progress not perfection: “Today I know that I am the problem.” Thanks for laying yourself out there Kevin.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s